Answering God’s Call Hasn’t Been Easy
This is going to be a long post....
Hard to believe it's been 2 years since the mayor took a chance and appointed me as the Director of ONE Lexington. An initiative designed to reduce the rate of gun violence in our city that had spiked to record-breaking levels during and immediately following the global pandemic and social unrest of 2020. When this job opportunity was presented to me by Chief Maynard and my friend Andrea James, my family was hanging on by a thread emotionally and financially in 2021 following the loss of our daughter, the polarizing presidential election that nearly ripped our country apart, and a once in a lifetime global pandemic. I never saw myself as someone who would work in government. My background was grassroots and I prided myself in challenging the system, not getting a paycheck from it. But I've also always felt God speaking to me to be a bridge in our community. Bringing together people and resources to eliminate gaps between services and those most vulnerable and in need. I always knew that my path required me to occupy some uncomfortable spaces in order to fully live out my purpose. So I took a shot and applied for the job. Because I lacked government experience, a college degree, and made a few mistakes when I was younger, I thought it would be a long shot to get hired. But by the grace of God, I made it through the competitive interview process and got the gig. God qualified me... An opportunity to see what I can do on this side of government while also being able to support my family.
The Honeymoon stage didn't last long though...
This job has taken an emotional toll on myself and my family in ways I've never quite been brave enough to share until now. Most recently, 2 young people that I love and serve through our program, unknowingly stole my car (thank God for FLOCK cameras, I got it back within an hour) while I was working out at the gym. I was torn between holding these young people accountable for their actions while also not burning trust with them in case they need me later in life. I chose to not burn their trust... Last year, during an intense election cycle, with our work (gun violence reduction) being at the heart of it, I saw friends and associates turn on me using social media subliminal as their weapon of choice. Questioning whether I was the right person for the job and even accusing me of just taking the job for a "paycheck" even though I had dedicated the previous 15 years of my life (while spending almost all of those year living in poverty myself) doing this work and trying my best to give back to my community. I saw political candidates attack our strategies without ever sitting down to talk with us. I was forced into a quick learning curve when it came to politics and so we just took it on the chin and kept moving. I was once berated via email with someone calling me the new "The Magic Negro". I had white people calling me a "nigger" in hate mail, while folks from my own community called me an "Uncle Tom"... I've even received multiple death threats since taking this position.... Earlier this year, I showed up at the scene of a homicide, like I often do, to provide the family with comfort and support if needed. I was engaged by a family member who was understandably emotional and he asked me,"Why are you even here?? Why couldn't you save my grandson??!" His words highlighted the unfair guilt and pressure that I often put on myself, every time a life was lost. Every siren that goes off, every text I receive, my heart skips a beat, wondering if there's been yet another shooting. I've lost 11 friends to gun violence since taking this job, the latest being my boy Big B, who I had brought in just a few days before he was murdered to speak to some kids at Tates Creek High School. Many in the community questioned me bringing individuals life Big B into spaces where they could talk to our youth. But because I'm in the trenches of this work, I understand the value of those that have certain lived experiences. My time in the streets gave me great perspective for this job, but my activity in the street was limited at best! I needed those who were fully engulfed in that lifestyle and suffered the consequences in order to reach our youth who are already in the cycle of violence. In 2022, we were in the middle of a 3rd straight record-breaking year for homicides in Lexington and people, understandably, wanted a quick fix. Unfortunately, it took centuries of disparities, inequities, and trauma to get us here, so I knew it was going to take more than just a few months to see progress. I was feeling the pressure of families who were directly affected by gun violence, impatient voters, and a media machine that highlighted every gun violence incident with scrutiny and no context, while our team patiently stayed the course and continued to work with over 30 community partners to build a strong strategic plan to reduce gun violence among youth and young adults in Lexington.
Our Mayor Linda Gorton constantly reminds her team that if we block out all the outside noise and focus on the PEOPLE, we put ourselves in the best position to serve the city of Lexington. Her commitment to the epidemic of gun violence has not only grown our annual budget each year but added 2 dedicated staff members Larry Lamont Johnson & Kenneth Payne to One Lexington, as well as stipends for our 4-person street outreach team. In just 2 years our team has facilitated a strong partnership with Cities United, successfully built a Crisis Response to any gun violence incidents involving youth or young adults, partnered with Galls to build a college scholarship program, facilitated a weekly in-school and summer youth mentoring program for youth directly impacted by gun violence, facilitated FREE trainings for our community partners, mediated over 50 conflicts between youth ages 12-17, partnered with CAC to build a Gun Violence Prevention grant program for grassroots organizations in Lexington, mobilized over 100 black men in Lexington to get involved in serving youth, provide victims services support for families directly impacted by violence, used hip hop workshops and social media campaigns to reach hundreds of FCPS students, and so much more. Combining evidence-based research with Lexington-centered solutions. And to think, One Lex is just one of the many organizations across the city doing this work!!
As stressful as this job has been, it's been equally fulfilling! I've had the opportunity to learn about local government, work with some amazingly passionate and talented folks in different sectors of the community, grow as a civil servant, and leverage government resources to underserved areas in my city. I also couldn't work with a better staff and team in the mayor's office! Not too many people get to wake up EVERY single day and clock into a PURPOSE DRIVEN job. I have worked a multitude of odd jobs in my life and I've exercised my gifts and talents in many different ways, not knowing exactly where it would lead. All I was ever sure of was that I wanted to help people.... I truly feel every step I took in my past was uniquely designed to get me where I am today and that's what drives me! I stopped worrying about what people were calling me, and focused on what God was calling me to do! I pray God protects our team as we move forward in this work. Last year we had 23 homicides at this time (19 gun related) and so far, this year we have 9 homicides. I pray we see even more progress over the next 2 years. I pray that our young people get a chance to live a full life. I pray that those whose hearts have been hardened by trauma can receive the mental health supports they need. I pray for continued unity and collaboration. 2 years in the books, and _____ more to go, God willing!